Tampa Bay Lightning
From SAS Wiki
The Tampa Bay Lightning enjoy music, moonlit strolls along the gulf coast's many beaches, and winning Stanley Cups. Turn-offs include neckbeards, good goaltending, and sensical salary cap management. Lately have shown renewed interest in earning high draft picks by icing a team of Vincent Lecavalier and 19 Teddy Purcells.
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Fun and True Lightning Facts
- Stellar 100% winning percentage in Stanley Cups finals they have reached.
- Traded Dan Boyle months after giving him a no trade clause.
- Current GM is Steve Yzerman who is called "cyclops" by Deafmute because of a scratched cornea. Ponder me that.
- Current coach ripped from the hands of God's chosen people
GM History
- Ex-GM Jay Feaster washed cars to get playoff tickets to sell out. Seriously.
Coach History
- Once coached by an illiterate man.
- Once coached by a mullet.
- Once coached by a "bookie to the stars".
Owner History
- Once owned by the Crypt keeper
- Previous co-owner produces the show Two And A Half Men. The other previous co-owner had an NHL career that lasted the equivalent of two and a half seasons.
- Previous co-owner played hockey with former coach John Tortorella in the minors. The other previous co-owner chose to fire him when assuming ownership.
Lightning Firsts!
- First female to play in the NHL. If it were not for Manon Rheaume, no women would be playing in the NHL today!
- Stanley Cup in Florida? LOLZZZZZ
Lightning Angles
- LOL SOUTH
- Gambling
- Trades like they are GMs in NHL10
- Seriously, though, GEOGRAPHY. (There is no snow there, you see.)
- All of these angles are still very, very funny and should be used often.
SAS Lightning Fans
