Detroit Lions

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Behold- a (fired) genius!

The Detroit Lions aren't very good, nor are they anyone, because THANK JESUS MILLEN IS FIRED

Lions Facts

  • Last Championship: 1957
  • Last Playoff Berth: 1999
  • Last Decent Player: Barry Sanders
  • Last Player to Retire out of Disgust: Barry Sanders
  • Last 8 Draft Busts: Joey Harrington (2002) Charles Rogers (2003) Kevin "Ow" Jones (2004) Mike Williams (2005) Ernie "Concussion" Sims (2006), Gosder "who?" Cherilus (2008), Kevin Smith (2008), Caleb "Oh sorry Army needs me after all" Campbell (Mr. Irrelevant)
  • Starting 2009 Quarterback: Matt "Bobby Layne" Stafford
  • Neodoomium hates them, but like a battered wife, is unable to leave the franchise.
  • Last GM to deserve firing, as well as death: Matt Millen
  • Last GM fired: Matt Millen (Thank God)

More about the Lions

<MaxNitwit316> Am I right to assume that if you get drafted by the Lions, you should probably just eat a gun right then and there?
<QuickStop> no suicide is a sin
<QuickStop> and you go to hell, which is not as bad as Detroit but it lasts longer

The Lions are like one of those "new" bums you see on the street from time to time. You know, the kind where the poor bastard never gets used to being homeless. It's new to him, its always new, painful and hopeless. He screams at people who walk by. Some throw the evil eye, or recoil in shock, but most don't seem to even notice. He has dreams, a vision for his future and memories of a somewhat successful past. There were days where he could not only walk and talk with the big boys, but run, and run he could. But what remains of those red letter days are the tears of an often grim reality. One of desperation, fleeting survival and desire to be one of them again. One of the big boys, one of the high fliers, someone that matters, someone with a name! One day, one day he will matter again. One day. -WalletBeef

What the Lions think about their fans

What NFL draftees think about the Lions


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