Dallas Stars
From SAS Wiki
The Dallas Stars are an NHL franchise based in Dallas, Texas. If they don't have a hilarious first round exit, drink too much with Pantera or play Detroit, that happens. -->
History
The Minnesota North Stars moved to Texas after getting to the Stanley Cup finals in 94. Truly, a move which many sports scientists and economists believe to be "fucking bullshit". Luckily after kicking out Casey for Andy Moog and eventually Ed Belfour, the Stars had the incredible benefit of being the only good sports team in the area after David Cone killed baseball in most of North Texas, after Troy Aikman was sacked enough to be considered legally retarded, but before Mark Cuban took the Dallas Mavericks out of laughing stock status. Fans were rewarded with Derian Hatcher beating the shit out of people for cheers, a Stanley Cup in 1999 that will never stop pissing off most of the country, a 2000 finals run, and a 2008 Western Conference Final loss to those fucking Swedish bastards and their happy-go-lucky style of gameplay.
Since Bob Gainey and Ken Hitchcock left the team in 2001 however, things have continued on the mediocre slide that has kept the Dallas Stars/North Stars almost legends for nearly half a century.
Facts, that are also True.
- Between periods at Reunion Arena, the ice was collected, flavored, and given to inner city children to help them cool off.
- Aaron Downey totally beat the fuck out of Jesse Boulerice in one punch, it was awesome.
- Dallas' pre-Salary Cap pay scales were astronomical, making Ed Belfour a billionaire.
See:
- Marty Turco
- Mike Modano
- Sergei Zubov
- Jere Lehtinen
- Jussi Jokinen is now in Tampa Bay. There are more Swedes than Fins, destroying the appeal of saying "The Finnish Line".
Related
