SAS Wiki:Current events

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Contents 1 SAS Wiki 2 MLB 3 NFL 4 NBA 5 NHL 6 FIFA World Cup 2010 7 NCAA 8 Golf 9 Tennis 10 NASCAR 11 Wrestling 12 Mixed Martial Arts 13 Competitive Eating

SAS Wiki

• Everyone's taking the Aspie test.

MLB

• OH GOD MY ELBOW
• Pedro Alvarez greatest thing to happen to Pittsburgh Pirates since maybe ever.
• Robinson Cano is the best player in the AL, and therefore all of baseball. This view may only be held by Yankee homers.
• Jack Zduriencik is going to take advantage of some poor schmuck for Cliff Lee - well it was the Rangers so they can commence their annual second-half collapse but still get half of a Cy Young out of it.
• Blue Jays still like hitting only dingers. Jose Bautista? Really?
• Carlos Zambrano is undergoing a psych eval for being on the Cubs.
• Arizona Diamondbacks behead front office, rest of world shocked to learn people actually follow the D'Backs. New manager Kirk Gibson shocked to find out that he cannot hit limp-off home run every game.
• Omar Infante makes National League All-Star team despite being a utility infielder who has appeared in 56 games out of 81 for the Braves with an OPS+ of 96. Entire sabermetrics world kills itself.

NFL

• JaMarcus Russell got that drank, got that drank, that Purple Drank. Also got a shiny new pair of bracelets.
• In a slightly related story, Herr Goodell suspends Johnny Jolly for the entire 2010 season.
• GET YO POPCRN RDY CINCY

NBA

• LEBRON LEBRON LEBRON is going to party in the city where the heat is on all night on the beach till the break of dawn.
• Amar'e Stoudemire might be a Jew, goes to Israel to find out

NHL

• Flames are struck with a malignant Jokinen
• gets 5.5 million and a no-trade from Ottawa
• Ilya Kovalchuk resigns with the Devils dashing hopes of Islanders fan(s) everywhere Gary Bettman sneezes or something and finds some testicles
• Pittsburgh Penguins sign new defensive corps. Might not be the softest in the league.

FIFA World Cup 2010

• Spain won. No one cares.

NCAA

• lol USC [1]

Golf

• Tiger Woods got cleaned the fuck out.
• But not as cleaned out as initially reported

Tennis

• Epic match won by an American

NASCAR

• LEFT TURN
• LEFT TURN
• LEFT TURN
• CRASH
• LEFT TURN

Wrestling

• Choking ring announcers with ties can get you fired, yet ramming a limo with a passenger inside doesn't.

Mixed Martial Arts

• Brock Lesnar is hated by MMA fans and loved by Wrestling fans. He punches people in the face, pisses off sponsors, and has fought like 3 people ever.
• Must have been the right three people, since he's now the undisputed UFC Heavyweight champion.
• Actually beat Shane Carwin by submission, lol.
• Fedor lol

Competitive Eating

• Joey Chestnut wins again! God bless America!
• Takeru Kobayashi imprisoned for possibly sedition or something I don't know.